Neopets - Articles

"Professor Clodbottle here, your resident Neopian Kougra expert on petpets and petpetpets! Today I would like to discuss a very important topic to all of Neopia: pollination!"

Another article that is extremely niche to my interests, where I discuss different petpet and P3 pollinators in Neopia. There are a lot of biology references in this one.

"Prof. Clodbottle here, ready to rate P3 bites and stings on a custom scale that I have designed! Don't worry, I will not be taking volunteers."

This is a really niche parody article that is probably only funny to me. There is an entomologist who has created a pain scale called the Schmidt pain scale index, for insect stings, and this is a parody on that.

Like all Neopets, Neopian academics come in all shapes, sizes, and personalities, but regardless of what type, or their field, they should all be celebrated as seekers of knowledge.

I wrote this really big article originally with a ton of details about each character, and it got rejected from the Neopian Times like 6x, so I just gave up on it. I think it was too big and maybe the editors didn't want to read it? It is a pretty niche topic that is probably only of interest to me lmao. So I submitted it to the Neopian Post, an awesome fan site. I'm still really happy with it and glad it has a place on this site!

Do you read textbooks for fun? Does decoding a previously undiscovered language sound like a typical weekend for you? If you have answered yes, then please consider reading on to determine the next steps on your Seeker's journey.

I also originally wrote this for the Times and I think it got rejected a few times. Very glad to see it on the Post now. I had fun searching for the different items and writing about them.

A guide of nontraditional and alternative Valentine's gifts.

I'm not a huge proponent of commercial holidays so I didn't want to lean into that aspect of it. Instead I listed other ways you could celebrate, like writing a poem or gifting a spooky petpet.

I love Halloween so I wanted to do something for the Halloween edition. It's a review of the non-gross foods from Spooky Foods. It was really fun making up facts for the different items. The Ghost Marshmallow are one of my fave Neopets items so I had to include those!

A review of different potions that cause changes! I had to make up a lot of information for each entry, since there isn't much to go on with just the item and a simple description! I focused on potions that cause some kind of transformation. I also included how I thought each one would smell like, which was fun.

The first NT submission I ever did, its a review of fall related coffee and tea items. I love a ridiculous pumpkin spice coffee drink, so that inspired me to write this. Getting this in motivated me to start writing continuously for Neopets.